THIS is Halloween!

Reading at Mental Multivitamin I found a post that inspired me to write one of my own: A tribute to Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas.

When my boys were 5 and 3, and my daughter only a fond wish, DH looked at me a few days before Halloween and said, "You remember how much we enjoyed The Nightmare Before Christmas when we saw it a few years back? I think the boys would love to see it, too." And I, fuzzy of memory for what was in the film, said, "Sure!"

So we all piled in the car and headed to Blockbuster (this was in our pre-Netflix days, mind you) and came home with a video. We popped our corn, plopped onto the couch, and hit "play."

About halfway through, DH and I are trading worried glances over and behind the boys' heads. We had forgotten about the screaming pumpkins and the scary ghoulies popping out from under beds. But the boys seemed not to mind, and we didn't want to ruin the mood, so we kept going.

When Santa is kidnapped and the mischievous goblins start torturing him, I reached for the remote control. DH stopped me silently, mouthing, "Just wait," and I deferred.

When Jack and his "Christmas presents" start scaring little kids all over town and the townspeople start firing rocket launchers at him, I just covered my eyes and prayed silently, "Oh, please, Lord, let them sleep tonight!"

And when the movie was over, my tender three year old son, who cried pitifully when the Karate Kid got a bloody nose and gave other kids his Happy Meal toys so that no one would feel left out - my sensitive son - looked at me solemnly and said,

"I. LOVE. THIS. MOVIE!"

And then he and his brother went stomping through the house shouting, "THIS is Halloween! THIS is Halloween! Pumpkins SCREAM in the dead of night!" And later, after the fifteenth or so viewing, they bellowed, "I am the one hiding under your STAIRS! Fingers like SNAKES and SPIDERS in my hair!" Then they giggled gleefully and started all over again.

So when dear, sweet daughter turned three, her brothers decided her time had come. She, too, was tragically exposed to talking skeletons and Santa-torture and spidery hair.

And she too, laughed gleefully and asked to see it "A-GAY-AN!"

Now we all know the words to This is Halloween and we sing them as we trick-or-treat. Well, we did until the boys got old enough to run away and not be seen looking like dorks trick-or-treating with their parents. But, thank Sandy Claws, they are not too old to watch Nightmare Before Christmas with us one more time.

Thank you, Jack Skelligan, for making my Halloween memories spidery-sweet.

Sunny (?) California

CONGRATULATIONS to Patty in WA for correctly identifying the location of the to-scale model of the Chrysler Building built entirely out of LEGOS on view at California's LEGOland! (Tell her what she's won, Johnny... ) Yes, for vacation we cashed in all the frequent flier miles we had and took off for Southern California, home of the Very Rich and Very Beautiful. (Okay, I know not everyone there is rich, but boy did we see our share of dizzyingly expensive sportscars. And really, everyone WAS beautiful, at all ages. Fit, tan, and high cheekboned.)

The educational side of the trip was the chance to expose the kids to a totally different landscape and culture from their own (yes, California is a totally different culture than the one we know in the South). Oh, yeah, and our day at the King Tut exhibit. (woo-hoo!) When I was in middle school, I took a class trip to Washington D.C. and we got to see the very same King Tut exhibit. It's back in the states now for the first time in over 20 years, and I accidently discovered that it would be in L.A. after I'd already booked our flights. I lost no time in scoring tickets and redeeming at least one day of vacation as a school day! (I got all geeked out about it because our state requires homeschoolers to report "attendance." Bleah. It always makes me happy to do a field trip to something educational I would have wanted to do anyway, count it as school, and hold my head up high. With a smug little smirk.)

Anyway, Tut was the same as I remembered it - fascinating. All those carvings, those statues, that furniture, the gold! Decorated and painted and thousands of years old... I always wonder whose hands did the carving and dying and weaving, and if they had any idea that three to five thousand years later total strangers who speak an unknown tongue would ooh and ahh over their skill.)

After Tut, we headed down to a beachside resort, where we sat around our hotel room for a couple of days watching it rain. Bleah again. But we caught up on some movies we'd all been wanting to see, and we found a bookstore with Internet where Daddy could check email, so we survived. And when the sun came out again, we became reacquainted with tide pools, body surfing, sand castles, and vast expanses of horizon. Aaah, salt air and stiff breeze.

Our last day, we decided to hit a theme park. We were close to the big one that begins with a D, but as we hit their bigger sister park only last year, we opted for Legoland instead. That was a nice surprise! Every member of our family marveled at the skill and artistry that is possible with a simple plastic brick. And it was nice to visit a theme park where all of the rides were accessible to the majority of our family, yet no one thought they were too "kiddy" or "boring." And we had nice, cool weather, which helped everyone's mood.

So that's the trip report. I have caught up on the laundry and gotten back into our school routine, so I am ready for reading all of Y'ALL's blogs to see what you were up to while I was gone. And to get ready for HALLOWEEN!!!!!!! (Yes, we're trick-or-treatin' fools around here. No offense to our friends who shun the sport.)

Happy fall, everyone! Below are a couple more vacation photos.

Visiting Hagrid at his cottage

 

Demosthenes at the Sea

 

There's No Place Like Home

We're home.

I really like taking vacations, but the very best part, to me, is coming home and seeing the place with new eyes. I always have a renewed sense of gratitude and appreciation for home when I return from a long trip. Do you remember this scene from The Wind in the Willows?

We others, who have long lost the more subtle of the physical senses, have not even proper terms to express an animal's inter-communications with his surroundings, living or otherwise, and have only the word `smell,' for instance, to include the whole range of delicate thrills which murmur in the nose of the animal night and day, summoning, warning? inciting, repelling. It was one of these mysterious fairy calls from out the void that suddenly reached Mole in the darkness, making him tingle throughand through with its very familiar appeal, even while yet he could not clearly remember what it was. He stopped dead in his tracks, his nose searching hither and thither in its efforts to recapture the fine filament, the telegraphic current, that had so strongly moved him. A moment, and he had caught it again; and with it this time came recollection in fullest flood.

Home! That was what they meant, those caressing appeals, those soft touches wafted through the air, those invisible little hands pulling and tugging, all one way! Why, it must be quite close by him at that moment, his old home that he had hurriedly forsaken and never sought again, that day when he first found the river! And now it was sending out its scouts and its messengers to capture him and bring him in. Since his escape on that bright morning he had hardly given it a thought, so absorbed had he been in his new life, in all its pleasures, its surprises, its fresh and captivating experiences. Now, with a rush of old memories, how clearly it stood up before him, in the darkness! Shabby indeed, and small and poorly furnished, and yet his, the home he had made for himself, the home he had been so happy to get back to after his day's work. And the home had been happy with him, too, evidently, and was missing him, and wanted him back,and was telling him so, through his nose, sorrowfully, reproachfully, but with no bitterness or anger; only with plaintive reminder that it was there, and wanted him.

The call was clear, the summons was plain. He must obey it instantly, and go.

That's how I feel about home. When I'm off adventuring, I'm absorbed in my "new life, in all its pleasures." But when I get close enough to home to smell it, it's all I want. How grateful I am to be here again!

Next entry I'll tell you where we went and what we did. But for now, here's a little hint. Can you guess where we were? (You have to look carefully - it's not what it appears to be!)?

Getaway Part 2

Well, I liked the whole time-off concept so much I'm going back for more! (grin) No, the truth is that dh and I have finally... FINALLY... finished our big project at work. Deadlines have been met. Obligations have been fulfilled. Follow-up has been turned over. Which means... gasp... WE CAN TAKE A VACATION!

So that's what we're going to do. It will be quiet here for a few days, but I'll post a full report when we get back. (And I'm taking another Dallas Willard book with me to read... so if any of it actually gets read, I might even have some food for thought to post from it. We'll see.)

So please! Don't give up on me when you see the same post sitting here day after day! I will be back... before too long.

Getaway

This weekend I went on a women's retreat with my church. It was surprisingly refreshing, and not just because I got two nights and two days off from cooking and laundry and Saxon math. No, this weekend was much more.

I went into the weekend with more than a little angst. For the past week I've not slept well, and I know why. I've been all tied up in knots over a decision that dh and I have made/are making/keep talking about endlessly, and I just haven't been able to get any peace about it. I finally decided late in the week that God didn't want me to have peace about it - that it served some purpose of His to keep me all agitated and confused. If that sounds critical of Him, it's not meant to be... it's just that I believe God does this to me and other people I know on a regular basis, because He is not interested in my status quo, especially when I am. He's always on the move, trying to do something in me or for me.

Anyway, I drove up to the retreat center with my sister and told her, on the way, that I expected to spend the weekend either crying or cussing a good bit of the time. I was prepared just to confront God with all this angst and just see what He had to say to me. And I didn't expect it to be pretty.

And yet... once again, He surprised me. I just felt... calm. All weekend. I did cry a little, but I had lots of glorious time alone and even more glorious time in deep conversation with various friends, and the result was that I felt loved, and cared for, and wanted. It reminded me that God loves and cares for and wants me. Which helped me to relax about our big decision and trust that He would not leave us dangling, at least not forever. I was reminded, so gently, that I did not need to know the answer up front... I can stay on the path and just see where it leads and be okay with not knowing the final destination.

Trust - the best sleep aid known to man.

Shout Out To Patty

Just wanted to say a blogger's goodbye to Patty in WA, who posted what she says is her last post at her blog. Which I totally understand, as this blogging thing can be a burden, when you don't have time or "mindshare" (sorry, lazy me to use that word) to devote to it. Nevertheless, Patty is one of those gals that I can just tell I would be good friends with IRL. I love her parenting philosophies and her Lord-of-the-Rings trivia and her funny stories about her BoyBob and her compassionate but no-nonsense responses to the confused or overbearing or insufferable or miserable or amusing homeschooling moms who post on the WTM boards.

I've been reading and sometimes-posting on the WTM boards for over 5 years now. Personalities come and go, there. Nowadays the boards move so fast that I cannot keep up, and often they get clogged with repetitive silliness or arguing that doesn't interest me. However, there are enough hidden treasures of posts there on a regular basis to keep me checking. Patty, I always check your posts... along with Robin in TX, Katherine B., MFS, Diane, abbeyej, Rosemary in CO, Dy, Joanne in TX, Kolbi (when she makes her rare appearance), and a few others who used to be regular but I haven't seen in a long time. I'm sure I've missed some good names in this list, but I make the list anyway as a way of complimenting you - you are in good company with a short list of thoughtful, funny, and wise homeschool moms whose opinions I value.

I hope I haven't read the last from you!

With much affection,
Mamabird

The Next Generation

This NYT article interested me. It's all about the "new" trend of college gals who want a career until they have kids, then plan to stay home.

I have mixed feelings on this subject, but they mostly trend toward eye-rolling at all the angst and harsh judgmentalism there seems to be out there regarding women who go after a premium education and presumably "waste" it by not sacrificing themselves on the altar of materialism and corporate ladder-climbing.

The faulty assumptions behind the "what-a-waste" mentality are, in my opinion:

1) Raising children is a brainless endeavor that doesn't require an education in order to do well. Okay, I'll grant you that college today is a very expensive life choice, especially if you pursue an Ivy-League diploma. And I do give some credit to the idea that you want a return on that kind of financial investment. But, in the words of my wise mother-in-law... Send a man to school, and you've educated a man. Send a woman to school, and you've educated a family. Even if a mother does not use her education in the pursuit of homeschooling her kids, her life experiences - including the breadth and depth of her education - will all contribute heavily toward her worldview, which cannot help but assert itself in the raising of her children. And if we really value an educated society as much as we say we do, isn't in everyone's best interest that as many citizens as possible receive a higher education? Which segues nicely into Faulty Assumption Numero Dos:

2. The purpose of higher education is to make a lot of money. There is a definite undercurrent of disbelief in this article that anyone would want to give up the presumed six-figures that a prestigious diploma will yield in order to do something as financially unproductive as raising children. Since when did educated voters, jurors, volunteers, participants in low-profile but entirely necessary grass-roots organizations, neighbors, friends, and parents lose their value to society? You can enjoy the benefits of an educated populace in more than spreadsheets.

3. The only way to earn anything with your big college degree is to work full-time in a regular corporate job and put your kids in daycare. As is now obvious, I have a bias towards those gals who were interviewed for that article. I don't think their expectations are "unrealistic" or "naive" or "outdated" (opinions I've read in response to this piece) and I hope they achieve their goals of marrying, working for a time, and then stepping down to stay home. But even if they don't - even if life throws a curve ball, if the husband leaves or they can't get pregnant, or they do get pregnant and have triplets! - they are getting an education. It's an asset. And just because they don't follow a traditional career path does not mean that they can't reap some earning benefit from their degrees.

I got my undergrad degree in psychology. As psych majors everywhere know, this degree is practically useless. So right out of school I worked as a secretary, and after a couple of years I went back to grad school and got a counseling degree. The plan was that I'd work as a counselor for a while and then we'd start talking family, but since I'd have an established practice, I could keep working some, just to keep up my skills.

Well, life is what happens while you're making other plans, right? I got pregnant 9 months before I was to graduate. Ds #1 was born six days after I finished my last class. I did graduate - but I never did get that "established practice" that would enable me to work part-time around my mothering skills.

But you know what? That counseling degree has still been worth its weight in gold. It's informed my parenting decisions. It's helped me keep perspective in the dark times of marriage when I was tempted to believe that throwing dishes might be a valid relationship skill. And, three years ago, when dh said, "I want to start a company," I actually had something to contribute. And still do. Could I have started this company? No, certainly not. But could he have started it without me? I don't think so, and neither does he. My education, combined with his, and our life experiences together, synthesized to make us capable of much more than either of us could have accomplished alone.

So have I gotten a return on my education dollars? You betcha, and not just in money. I was one of those gals who thought she'd just work and then stay home with her kids. Life took an unexpected twist, a good one, and I'm now a homeschooling-mom-who-works-on-the-side. What if I'd never gone to college or to grad school? I'm sure I wouldn't have that choice today, to support my husband as he supports our family. It's a team effort around here, and I think that's what the original women's rights advocates would have applauded.

Cooking Class

Saturday night I had a Barnes and Noble gift card burning a hole in my pocket and a restless, I've-been-working-at-home-all-weekend-and-I'm-sicka-this-place dh, and two boys who needed picking up from their spontaneous get-together with an old friend, and the pickup spot was conveniently down the street from our local Barnes and Noble. Whoo-eee! What more excuse did we need? Anyway, we hightailed it down to B&N, where on the way to the ladies' room (always the first stop when you have a six-year-old daughter) I walked past the display of new releases, and what did I see but Julie and Julia (Julie Powell), nestled, of course, right beside a stack of new editions of Mastering the Art of French Cooking (Julia Child).

It only took me three pages to determine that the gift card was now committed. I brought it home and read till midnight, then picked it up again Sunday morning even before getting out of bed. And then finished it after church. VERY satisfying way to read a book, btw... while there are some books you want to savor and take your time finishing (The Time Traveler's Wife and Five Quarters of the Orange come to mind), there are others that make you want to put the rest of life on hold until you finish. Julie and Julia had that effect on me. For one thing, I love books about food. Like, Like Water for Chocolate. Or the aforementioned Five Quarters (thanks to Crissy in WA for letting me know about it!).

Another reason this book is so great is that it is about breaking out - going down an unconventional path and finding freedom. This has become a precious truth to me over the last few years - that following your instincts, even if you make a few false starts, is not as scary or as fraught with danger as you think it is. In fact, taking that risky path might just lead you to joy. Freedom. Fulfillment.

Anyway, Julie and Julia is a fun read. (I will insert a disclaimer about salty language... if language is an issue for you, then you might want to pass on this book. However, I personally found her word usage very funny. There is profane cussing, and there is laugh-out-loud cussing. Hers is the latter.)

What are you guys reading?