Pardon Me, Your Toddler is Screaming
Interesting article today in the NYT about restaurants and coffee shops that are offending customers by asking them to "control" their children. Interesting to me because I can see both sides of the issue. On the one hand, it truly is no fun to go out to eat and be assaulted by the piercing screams of a toddler whose oblivious parents are chatting on their cell phones. On the other, it is truly no fun to take your children out for a treat and endure dirty looks from the young singles and DINKs who obviously think that once you have children you should never be allowed out in public again. Ah, what's a parent to do?
Apparently many restaurant owners are trying to solve the problem by putting up signs requesting that parents be in charge of their children. Many of the parents have responded by "boycotting" the restaurants in question. But what did the offending signs say? According to the article, they say things like, "Children of all ages have to behave and use their indoor voices," and "No lifeguard on duty."
Frankly, while I do take issue with adults who treat children as sub-human, I am not offended by such signs as these. Children do need to learn to use inside voices. (So do a lot of cell-phone-brandishing adults.) And parents DO need to take responsibility for their children. It's sadly true that you can see a lot of bad parenting, or non-parenting, when you are out in public.
The only offense I would take would be with the clerks or fellow customers who believed that a child's bad manners justified a response in kind. Like the server cited in the article who snarked, "We've got a screamer!" I mean, really. If you want children to know how polite people behave, you've got to model polite behavior for them.
What's more, isn't every situation improved when there's a little grace available? Do we have to roll our eyes and assume the worst when we see someone of the childhood persuasion walk through our establishment's door? And on the other side, do we have to bristle and assume that a business owner is a child-hater and Scrooge just because he or she would like to maintain a reasonable atmosphere in said business? I think a little grace on both sides could go a long way.
Courtesy is an invaluable life skill. I hope that more people will give this idea the consideration it deserves.
Apparently many restaurant owners are trying to solve the problem by putting up signs requesting that parents be in charge of their children. Many of the parents have responded by "boycotting" the restaurants in question. But what did the offending signs say? According to the article, they say things like, "Children of all ages have to behave and use their indoor voices," and "No lifeguard on duty."
Frankly, while I do take issue with adults who treat children as sub-human, I am not offended by such signs as these. Children do need to learn to use inside voices. (So do a lot of cell-phone-brandishing adults.) And parents DO need to take responsibility for their children. It's sadly true that you can see a lot of bad parenting, or non-parenting, when you are out in public.
The only offense I would take would be with the clerks or fellow customers who believed that a child's bad manners justified a response in kind. Like the server cited in the article who snarked, "We've got a screamer!" I mean, really. If you want children to know how polite people behave, you've got to model polite behavior for them.
What's more, isn't every situation improved when there's a little grace available? Do we have to roll our eyes and assume the worst when we see someone of the childhood persuasion walk through our establishment's door? And on the other side, do we have to bristle and assume that a business owner is a child-hater and Scrooge just because he or she would like to maintain a reasonable atmosphere in said business? I think a little grace on both sides could go a long way.
Courtesy is an invaluable life skill. I hope that more people will give this idea the consideration it deserves.
posted by Mamabird @ 7:09 PM
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